Overall reflection on LMS
Overall, I feel that LMS is a very interesting topic with lots of important contents inside it that can enable us to express our feelings or emotions more clearly, and not pressing them down. From all the LMS lessons, I feel that the biggest thing which has changed in me is that I have become more confident and can speak more clearly when doing presentation. The project works which we have done have been helpful in a way that through this project, it not only helped me to have more friends, but also learn more things such as the different kinds of conflicts in Singapore. Not only in Singapore, but in other countries as well. For example, I have learnt about the culture in Thailand where most people are transvestites and this is accepted amongst them.
After taking this module, I have become more optimistic in life as we can solve any problems easily if we think about them calmly, and not solve them in a rushed manner. My relationship with my family and friends have also improved as we communicate better and not quarrel over trivial matters.
Some of the knowledge, skills and insights I have learnt from this module are that we cannot avoid conflicts, but we must try to rectify them and correct them as soon as we find out the root of the problem. Conflicts can lead to anger. We have to try to control our temper for the first few times even if someone comes to irritate us and not go into an outburst straightaway. If we shout at people the moment we are not happy with them, people will think that we are very unreasonable and nobody would want to talk to us. As for fear, I have learnt the several types of fear and how we can overcome them. Other than this, we have also learnt success and the different people and different types of success.
This module is very enjoyable in a way that during tutorials, there are several activities that are held in between the lesson, like the conflict game, story-telling game in the first few lessons, the role play etc. I find that these activities were very helpful in helping us to understand the topics better and we would also not feel very bored in between the lessons. I also enjoyed doing all the quizzes that helped us to realise more about ourselves. From these quizzes, I realised that I did not know myself as much as i thought before attempting them. I personally feel that there is nothing else to improve on this module as I find it quite a nice module to relax. Except that maybe the tutorial room is too far and we have to walk a long way before reaching there? (:
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Managing Conflict
Managing Conflict
'Conflict is a normal part of our daily lives and social relations. We often view conflict as a negative experience and respond in counterproductive ways, causing further anger and resentment. Yet conflict, if managed with sensitivity and openness, is an opportunity for personal growth and improvement in our relationships with others.'
Conflicts involve struggles, disagreements, disputes or quarrels. Conflict arises when two or more groups perceive that their needs, interests, views, values or goals are incompatible. The 3 concepts that outline the most conflicts are: 1-Needs (what you want in a conflict), 2-Interests (What you want out of achieving your goals in a conflict), 3- Values (Values are fundamental beliefs that are non-negotiable).
There are also five types of conflicts: 1- Relationship conflicts (Relationship conflicts are caused by poor or miscommunication, stereotyping, strong negative emotions or repetitive negative behavior), 2- Data conflicts (Data-based conflicts are caused by lack of information, misinformation, different views on what are relevant, different interpretations of data and different ways of assessing or processing data), 3- Interest-based conflicts (Interest conflicts are caused by competition over perceived incompatible needs), 4- Structural Conflicts (Structural conflicts are usually caused by forces external to the people in dispute), 5- Value-based conflicts (Value based conflicts are caused by perceived or actual incompatability in values, goals and worldview. Differing values need not cause conflict. It is only when people attempt to force one set of values on others or are intolerant of divergent beliefs that results in conflicts).
However, there are still some positive outcomes of conflict. Conflict improves self-awareness, conflict can strengthen relationships, conflict promotes group cohesion, conflict promotes creativity, conflict helps problem-solving and conflict can be fun and motivating. In conflict, we can have a lot of conflict management styles. They are the avoiding style, competing style, accomodating style, compromising style and the collaborating style. I am most of the time using the collaborating style, because by using this style, we can have a win-win situation by seeking the best solutions for both parties. The Kare Anderson's Model is a good way for conflict resolution. There are 4 steps to it: 1- Tell yourself your main needs, 2- Reach out to find the other person's main needs, 3- Listen to the other person, 4- Propose a solution that supports their main needs and yours as well.
Through the LMS conflict presentation, I have learnt a lot of things about conflict other than what is inside the notes. For example, what are the different kinds of conflict, how do we solve them using the best way, and what other problems can arise out of conflict. For our group, we did the conflict on cultural difference. This led me to understand more about people's culture and I will not look at them in a funny way if i ever meet them in the future. Although our groups face much problems like the doing of the powerpoint slides, we still worked well together, and there were very little conflicts as all of us were involved in the discussions and we knew what we had to do for each of our parts. (:
'Conflict is a normal part of our daily lives and social relations. We often view conflict as a negative experience and respond in counterproductive ways, causing further anger and resentment. Yet conflict, if managed with sensitivity and openness, is an opportunity for personal growth and improvement in our relationships with others.'
Conflicts involve struggles, disagreements, disputes or quarrels. Conflict arises when two or more groups perceive that their needs, interests, views, values or goals are incompatible. The 3 concepts that outline the most conflicts are: 1-Needs (what you want in a conflict), 2-Interests (What you want out of achieving your goals in a conflict), 3- Values (Values are fundamental beliefs that are non-negotiable).
There are also five types of conflicts: 1- Relationship conflicts (Relationship conflicts are caused by poor or miscommunication, stereotyping, strong negative emotions or repetitive negative behavior), 2- Data conflicts (Data-based conflicts are caused by lack of information, misinformation, different views on what are relevant, different interpretations of data and different ways of assessing or processing data), 3- Interest-based conflicts (Interest conflicts are caused by competition over perceived incompatible needs), 4- Structural Conflicts (Structural conflicts are usually caused by forces external to the people in dispute), 5- Value-based conflicts (Value based conflicts are caused by perceived or actual incompatability in values, goals and worldview. Differing values need not cause conflict. It is only when people attempt to force one set of values on others or are intolerant of divergent beliefs that results in conflicts).
However, there are still some positive outcomes of conflict. Conflict improves self-awareness, conflict can strengthen relationships, conflict promotes group cohesion, conflict promotes creativity, conflict helps problem-solving and conflict can be fun and motivating. In conflict, we can have a lot of conflict management styles. They are the avoiding style, competing style, accomodating style, compromising style and the collaborating style. I am most of the time using the collaborating style, because by using this style, we can have a win-win situation by seeking the best solutions for both parties. The Kare Anderson's Model is a good way for conflict resolution. There are 4 steps to it: 1- Tell yourself your main needs, 2- Reach out to find the other person's main needs, 3- Listen to the other person, 4- Propose a solution that supports their main needs and yours as well.
Through the LMS conflict presentation, I have learnt a lot of things about conflict other than what is inside the notes. For example, what are the different kinds of conflict, how do we solve them using the best way, and what other problems can arise out of conflict. For our group, we did the conflict on cultural difference. This led me to understand more about people's culture and I will not look at them in a funny way if i ever meet them in the future. Although our groups face much problems like the doing of the powerpoint slides, we still worked well together, and there were very little conflicts as all of us were involved in the discussions and we knew what we had to do for each of our parts. (:
Friday, May 18, 2007
Managing Anger
Managing Anger
Many a times, people get angry very easily when they are in a bad mood. Although the person has done nothing wrong, they will still vent their anger on them. As what is stated in the notes, "Anger is a natural emotional response to perceived frustration, threats, disappointments, and stress. There are also strong cognitive and physiological components accompanying the emotions of anger." I feel that this statement is really true. Whenever we are really upset with something, we will show our anger, no matter how much we want to control it.
There are several physical responses of anger. Some of the examples are tightened muscles, headaches, breathing difficulties, vomiting etc. This are some ways in which people show that they are angry. These people will get impatient, irritated and disgusted easily. If we are angry, there are some ways in which we can respond to our anger: control, outburst and withdrawal. Controlling is that we still get on with our work like nothing has happened before. Outburst is that people will suddenly shout and then scold the people whom they are angry with, and withdrawing is that we have already given in to the situation and we do not want to do anything about it already.
Expressing our anger is that we direct anger at the right target, gives you a sense of control over the situation, express anger after cooling down and we must enable the other party to feel less angry. I feel that negative self-talk doesn't help either. It only sums up to us getting even more angry. Instead, we should turn the negative self-talks into positive ones, this can enable us to calm down more and think about where the problem lies, and then, we can find solution to the problem. The problem can be solved more quickly this way.
The role play did in class was helpful in telling us the way people their anger, and the different examples of people getting fed-up over something. Hope everyone can control their anger better by letting go of it. I really feel that it doesn't help to get angry over small things. It will spoil our mood for the whole day. (:
Many a times, people get angry very easily when they are in a bad mood. Although the person has done nothing wrong, they will still vent their anger on them. As what is stated in the notes, "Anger is a natural emotional response to perceived frustration, threats, disappointments, and stress. There are also strong cognitive and physiological components accompanying the emotions of anger." I feel that this statement is really true. Whenever we are really upset with something, we will show our anger, no matter how much we want to control it.
There are several physical responses of anger. Some of the examples are tightened muscles, headaches, breathing difficulties, vomiting etc. This are some ways in which people show that they are angry. These people will get impatient, irritated and disgusted easily. If we are angry, there are some ways in which we can respond to our anger: control, outburst and withdrawal. Controlling is that we still get on with our work like nothing has happened before. Outburst is that people will suddenly shout and then scold the people whom they are angry with, and withdrawing is that we have already given in to the situation and we do not want to do anything about it already.
Expressing our anger is that we direct anger at the right target, gives you a sense of control over the situation, express anger after cooling down and we must enable the other party to feel less angry. I feel that negative self-talk doesn't help either. It only sums up to us getting even more angry. Instead, we should turn the negative self-talks into positive ones, this can enable us to calm down more and think about where the problem lies, and then, we can find solution to the problem. The problem can be solved more quickly this way.
The role play did in class was helpful in telling us the way people their anger, and the different examples of people getting fed-up over something. Hope everyone can control their anger better by letting go of it. I really feel that it doesn't help to get angry over small things. It will spoil our mood for the whole day. (:
Monday, April 30, 2007
Enhancing Self-Awareness and Self-Esteem
Enhancing Self-Awareness and Self-Esteem
We learnt about what qualities we have, both positive and negative through a personal inventory which requires us to rate ourselves on a scale of 0-3, ranging from 'almost never' to 'almost always'. For example, if we are given an adjective 'adventurous' or 'friendly', we are supposed to rate from 0-3. This exercise has enabled me to know myself better, because in real life, we always let people rate us according to our personalities through our actions. We do not really rate ourselves because we think that we already know ourselves very well, until we really think about it and then we will reflect on ourselves and know ourselves better. We are also supposed to state which qualities which we like about ourselves the most. I feel that this is also important because by knowing what qualities which we like about ourselves the most, we can work on them more and improve on them.
During our lesson, we also played sort of like a story-telling game which we are supposed to sit in one circle and then take turns to tell a part of a story which we create ourselves. The last perosn is supposed to say the moral of the story. This helps to boost our confidence and be more creative as we need to make our sentences easy for the next person to continue.
The Johari Window has enabled me to know whether i am open to feedback given to me by other people. I feel that i am opened to feedback and accept what people think and feel about me, thereby changing myself for the better. This is very important as if we are not open to feedbacks, we will never know what people think about us and we can't change ourselves accordingly.
Lastly, the survey done on self-esteem was very useful. After doing the survey, i feel that i have quite a positive self-esteem. I am quite an optimistic person. It's not really good being pessimistic as we will affect people around us and we will have problems communicating in the future because, if we do not have self-confidence, people will also not have confidence in us and project works will be very hard to do.
We learnt about what qualities we have, both positive and negative through a personal inventory which requires us to rate ourselves on a scale of 0-3, ranging from 'almost never' to 'almost always'. For example, if we are given an adjective 'adventurous' or 'friendly', we are supposed to rate from 0-3. This exercise has enabled me to know myself better, because in real life, we always let people rate us according to our personalities through our actions. We do not really rate ourselves because we think that we already know ourselves very well, until we really think about it and then we will reflect on ourselves and know ourselves better. We are also supposed to state which qualities which we like about ourselves the most. I feel that this is also important because by knowing what qualities which we like about ourselves the most, we can work on them more and improve on them.
During our lesson, we also played sort of like a story-telling game which we are supposed to sit in one circle and then take turns to tell a part of a story which we create ourselves. The last perosn is supposed to say the moral of the story. This helps to boost our confidence and be more creative as we need to make our sentences easy for the next person to continue.
The Johari Window has enabled me to know whether i am open to feedback given to me by other people. I feel that i am opened to feedback and accept what people think and feel about me, thereby changing myself for the better. This is very important as if we are not open to feedbacks, we will never know what people think about us and we can't change ourselves accordingly.
Lastly, the survey done on self-esteem was very useful. After doing the survey, i feel that i have quite a positive self-esteem. I am quite an optimistic person. It's not really good being pessimistic as we will affect people around us and we will have problems communicating in the future because, if we do not have self-confidence, people will also not have confidence in us and project works will be very hard to do.
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